It’s no secret that I have decision making issues. It’s also no secret that often, not making a decision IS a decision. And finally, it’s not a secret that I come by this naturally.
My dad is a perpetual car shopper. He shops for cars the way women shop for shoes or handbags. Often. However, he only makes purchases every decade or so.
So… He took me to the Apple Store yesterday as I needed to get my laptop checked out. Following that excursion, he asked if I had time to drop by some auto dealers in the area. I have accompanied him many times on car shopping excursions. I don’t think i had ever been present when he has actually purchased a car. We drive through a few lots without really getting out to look. He gets some info from a salesman. He drives off, not really sure where he’s headed. So we stop for lunch at Taco Bell ad I get on my phone to look for cars. And look. And look.
I’m looking for several models of cars and then he tells me what he’d really like. So, I search for that. And it’s there. I tell him, “Dad, I just found your car”. The model, color, etc. that he really wants. So, we head to the dealer to check it out. We test drive it and he really likes it. We hop to the dealer next door to test drive the other car he was looking at. It’s clearly NOT the car for him the moment I sit down. We drive it anyway. Then head back to the other dealer. And stall. And think. And struggle.
It’s interesting to be in the observers chair watching your father work through his hangups. Decisions. Or, actually, one decision. It’s not the money. And it’s not the car. These aren’t thing things that hang him up. It’s the actual DECISION to make the purchase.
I have no idea how to really help him. I’m not getting many verbal or body language clues as to which direction he wants to go. I want to help him. Get him out if he needs rescuing. Push him to sign the deal if that’s his bent. So, we sit… in silence at times. He sorta decides to head home. But, you can tell there’s a hesitation. This is really THE car for him.
There are several clues that lead me to this decision. Many of which aren’t even about his body language. Or his desires. It’s about TIME. This is the TIME for him to make a purchase. This IS the car for him. And it just makes sense. So, I generally push that direction.
It takes some time, but, we finally leave the dealer. He has the car. He made the decision.
And, then, about as soon as we the highway, he already has buyers remorse.
Ugh.
