Lots of things and a somewhat emotional day for me as a couple of things are happening that are requiring me to just let go. I don’t think I necessarily “held on” too tight, but, it’s still difficult as in my minds eye, I saw things differently than what actually happened.
God has graciously allowed me to be a part of several things that have astounded me. And I am truly gracious. The “me” part of me, wants to make it about me, so perhaps, the “letting go” is more about letting go of those things I have trapped in my feeble mind. Letting go of me.
As people need and then not need me, I get trapped into the lie that perhaps I am unnecessary. Being somewhat of a people pleaser, it’s hard to not be needed anymore. I suppose it will be even more difficult when my kids no longer need me!
So, away they go. I have given them what they needed. Now it’s just me and God.
In an interesting ironic twist of all that, a song that pulls me back to reality, written by one of the aforementioned “several things”…
All the chisels I’ve dulled carving idols of stone
That have crumbled like sand ‘neath the waves.
I’ve recklessly built all my dreams in the sand just to watch, them all wash away.Through another day, another trial, another chance to reconcile
To one who sees past all I see.
And reaching out my weary hand I pray that you’d understand
You’re the only one who’s faithful to me.All the pennies I’ve wasted in my wishing well
I have thrown like stones to the sea.
I have cast my lots, dropped my guard, searched aimlessly for a faith
To be faithful to me.Through another day, another trial, another chance to reconcile
To one who sees past all I see.
And reaching out my weary hand I pray that you’d understand
You’re the only one who’s faithful to me.
You’re the only one who’s faithful to me.
Amen.
