GMA has always been an issue for me. As i’ve always tried to do it “on the cheap”, I’ve never ante’d up for the full registration to the conference. Hence, I am a poser. If people were at all interested beyond themselves, I would be spotted out like a rabbit at a cheetah gathering. Perhaps I am anyway. Yesterday was a good day. Met some new people, connected with some “old” people. That sort of thing. I could get on a self depricating trip here. However, I’ve been praying for 3 things each day. 1. To be myself. I am good, I am happy, I am comfortable when I don’t try to be something I am not. 2. To have some confidence. I feel like I’ve been “beat down” by myself, circumstances and by others, especially as related to this industry. Have some confidence! 3. For His purpose for me to be revealed each day. God has a plan, for my every waking moment. Am I ready to answer to His call?

Perhaps I am to always be the bridesmaid. As soon as something starts to happen, for whatever reason, I get left behind. Regardless of the history. I say I  enjoy the development stage. So, I should be happy for the successes of those I work(ed) for post-me. And overall, I am. It’s just tough to not be able to fully realize that success.

So, I am here. Not sure how to make the most of it, being a poser and all. I need to take the bull and try to run with it. The twisted psychology of my life. Time to run under the shell again. No wonder we’re not finding anyone to manage.