I’ve been struggling with whether or not to “make a go” for this whole funkhouse remodeling thing. It started pretty innocently. As things in my life tend to start…
In many ways, it started back in 1994 and even somewhat before that. 1994. Our first home. We didn’t own it, but, it was a family house that we had full reign over. We could do whatever we wanted to it. So we got our feet wet. In some ways, it was a great thing. No need to ask permission. Do whatever we wanted. No house payment. But, no equity and we were generally throwing $ out the window. Except, we were living rent free and the whole “taking care of things” fell into our general agreement on living rent free. So, there you go.
So, we did some work in the kitchen and the bathroom, painted walls, did some plumbing, installed a new A/C, installed new wiring to the house, refinished floors, remodeled a couple of bedrooms. You know, “normal” stuff.
And that continued through all the homes we have since purchased, lived in and subsequently sold. We broke even (maybe?!?) on that family house. Maybe broke even on the next house. Lost money on the next house. Made a good deal of money on the next house. And now we’re on house #5.
In Dec. 2014, I was asked to paint some kitchen cabinets fro a friend. He paid me. Well, sorta. Yes, it cost him money. But, I made about $3/hr. or less adding all things up.
I have been told by various people, especially as of late, that I should “really do this” in regards to doing remodeling work. When the first sale of the Wichita house fell through, I was looking at no job and time on my hands. So, when an offer came to paint some kitchen cabinets for another friend, I accepted the offer. I had the tools and time. Why not make a little money.
Then word got out.
I should/should have been excited that people wanted to use my skills for their own projects. And I generally was/am. I suppose I suffer from some confidence issues. And not being able to commit. Aaron would ask if I am waiting for something better to come along. And I would respond, well, yes. If I’m not completely “all in” on something, then yes, I leave room for something better to come along. That’s been an issue for me over the past 2 decades.
So, here I am, in the midst of needing to make a decision about the future of my remodeling career. Then I break my ankle. A warning sign? Perhaps. A hurdle? Yes. So, I’m out of commission on the remodeling thing. I have a helper who is certainly capable, but, I know that I don’t want to leave the whole thing up to him and I also know that if I get involved, I am likely to overdo it.
So, I stall.
And end up losing my helper in the process.
Now I’m left with even more of the decision. I haven’t totally committed to more than one job at this point. I have at least 3 in the works with another 2 in the wings. So, I don’t lack for work. But I do lack for motivation. And that ends up hurting me. I can blame lots of things, broken ankle included. And I would’t be wrong in finding fault in other areas.
But in the end, it comes down to me. Do I want to succeed with this? Or chalk it up to another failure? Or find something that’s in my wheelhouse and something I can be “all in” on? I tend to go with whatever falls in front of me. And this is what’s in front of me at present time.
But, I fear that I will become entangled with this and miss out on something more meaningful, more in what I want to do. And, something more team oriented than just me packing up my tools and heading out to the job.
As Bono sings, “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For”.
Am I just shooting myself in the foot by waiting?
